Breaking Free

I fell into a mind trap that swallowed up two years of my life.

HISTORY RINSE/REPEAT

Camouflaged by fear of dwindling funds, a blurred vision of defined goals, growing external pressures from loved ones, and a metamorphosis from a wolf’s instincts to a sheep, the hunter became the hunted. I returned to a past life of a grazer fed by a paycheck. Everything around me suffered including this blog.

In a twist of irony, July 9th, 2013 presented a wake-up call with a quick, cold, stinging verbal slap in the face. The owner of the small business, for whom I was working, threatened to alter my career in the worst way possible – by firing me through gross prejudice without any prudence.

Nth DEGREE MICROMANAGEMENT

My project, in which he botched via the age-old stumbling block of forceful intervention, resulted in unmanageable scope creep that fell upon the shoulders of yours truly. With his addition of complexities to my project, he turned a two-day deliverable into a four-day mad dash ensuring failure and turning a well oiled project into a debacle overnight.

Without any regard for the myriad of internal variables setting up the now bloated deliverable for failure, he blamed me. Not wanting to discuss the change in scope, the backlog of projects within supporting departments, or the fact his additions were given in the late afternoon before the 4th of July weekend and were now due the following Monday morning, it was just easier to pass the blame and sugar coat it. In his own special dictatorial cadence, with a threat I’ve never heard before in my professional life, he brought on the wrath due to frustration for his failures, not mine.

FIRST TIME FOR EVERYTHING

Never within my professional career spanning eighteen years have I been threatened of termination due to insubordination, destroying property, misconduct, poor performance, theft, or violating company policy.  You might be saying to yourself, “well, there’s a first time for everything.” Not so quick. I’m dealing with a different animal here; one that chews his way out of a corner even if it doesn’t exist. Everything and anything can be a recognized threat within his warped perception of protecting his own interests at all costs. The rest of it becomes collateral damage, which is none of his concern.

PHILOSOPHICAL GUT CHECK

Taking a step back and creating space between the job and myself, I resigned the same day the threat was delivered. Why? It’s quite simple. I was in a space that was contrary to every fiber of my being. Sacrificing everything for a paycheck to maintain minimal existence is not my path. I know it, and those that really understand me, know it too.

What is my point in sharing this occurrence with you? Stick with what you know about yourself and don’t let anyone or anything derail you. If you’re unsure about your inner drive and the path for which it will lead, then now is the time to discover one’s self and be true to your discoveries for the rest of your days. Do not delay. Procrastination is the path of the weak-minded. Excuses are the fuel that stoke procrastination.

It is my hope that from digesting this post you learn from my mistakes. If and when you find yourself off course in your own life, remember this: The road to your success is unique to you. It’s your road with your own defined boundaries. All that’s required by you is to stay on it.

 

 

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